Prompted poetry: search

Odd as it seems, this is a long poem for me. The first draft was shorter and much more dense and terse, but I feared it would be too opaque. Now I worry I may have gone too far in the other direction – did I draw this out too much? What do you think?

Precious

When she began looking, she was in high
spirits, cheerful and confident that it had simply been
mislaid. After sifting through clutter on table
and counter, she paused to consider when she had seen
it last and where.

She retraced her steps through several
rooms, spottily, not quite certain
which day was which, their sameness
as sad as it was bewildering. And still she believed
it would turn up.

She moved every piece of furniture, discovering
all manner of things lost but not at the moment
desired. She saw her cleaning had been lacking in certain
areas but did not allow herself to be distracted
by the shame.

Breathing steadily to quell
the panic she felt bubbling along the edges, she turned
all the rugs, shook them clear of dust
and hair and other small bits from shoes
and life.

At length she dropped to her knees
without hope in the center of the smallest
room in the house. A sob tore from her throat
as she glimpsed a metallic glint
beneath a baseboard.

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6 responses to “Prompted poetry: search

  1. I do think it could be tightened to heighten the drama, but I enjoyed this read..

  2. Perhaps it needs the build-up to echo the length of her search, but I am no poetry expert. It reminded me of the time I lost my wedding ring for weeks and eventually spotted it glinting in the laundry basket.

    • I’m delighted it reminded you of your own experience, though I’m sorry you had that experience in the first place. How dreadful, but I’m glad you had a happy ending. Thank you for commenting! 🙂

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